Helping a child overcome low self esteem is a responsibility and an opportunity that should not be overlooked. Children need a good self image to face life issues. This is more than just encouraging children to perform better or to get through specific hurdles or accomplishments.
Parents play a key role in how children perceive themselves. It could be how they are valued at home or how successful they have been with their activities. A child's self worth and self confidence are established over time through consistent affirmation. Even physical appearance is often an issue for kids. They may be small or just feel overweight. Body image can be a big deal.
At home, a child may only get attention when discipline is needed or when they accomplish some great milestone. This sends the message that their value is based on performance. Your feedback is important. Negative feedback, however, needs to be avoided.
How a person looks at themselves is evident in various ways:
Low self esteem
Children showing low self esteem could show these traits: Reluctance to take risks; shying away from peers; frequently tattling on siblings; bragging about accomplishments; teasing, bullying, and putting down others; becoming defensive when confronted; being easily frustrated; continually putting down themselves; exhibiting high anxiety levels.
High self esteem
Here are some signs that a child has a healthy self-esteem: Is willing to take risks; has a can do attitude; is outgoing; makes friends easily; understands that we make mistakes and knows that we don't have to be perfect at everything; makes positive statements about themselves; gives compliments to others easily; is able to laugh at himself; respects himself; can say no when appropriate; gives others the proper respect. They are optimistic about the future and can make good choices.
Some ways to assist parents in helping build self esteem:
Particate in some activity with your child. Something that will challenge them mentally or physically and in other ways. Point out improvements over time.
Have them learn or experience some new subject. This will show them that they can learn and understand unfamiliar material.
Encourage them to meet and make new friends.
Have them do things on their own. Encourage them to think through problems completely.
Encourage them to express themselves.
Give them useful responsibilities.
Help them to set goals that will give them a sense of purpose and direction.
Every child needs to know that they are important and valued. Elevating parenting to assist in this development requires signicant time and effort. It is an opportunity for parents to experience great joy as they see their children mature and grow up.
Often parents look for motivational words to encourage their children to try new things. The fear of failure can immobilize a child. Positive words, properly chosen, can help break through the negativity. Here are some quotes on success that may be an encouragement in improving self esteem:
Success quotes
When you play, play hard; when you work, don’t play at all. - Theodore Roosevelt
Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection. - Mark Twain
I don’t eat junk food and I don’t think junk thoughts. - Peace Pilgrim
Resolve never to quit, never to give up, no matter what the situation. - Jack Nicklaus
The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it. - Arnold H. Glasow
Use what talents you possess; The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best. - Henry Van Dyke
Praise and affirmation
Love needs to be through affirming actions and encouraging words. Children need to be told that they are special. Something as simple as a hug or a kiss is significant. Look for ways to acknowledge positive traits and accomplishments.
Here is a list of phrases that will have significant impact:
High Impact Words
Your kindness was noticed today...
I like being with you...
Great effort in your game...
You are special to me...
I love you...
I like your smile...
This was hard, but you made it...
You did it on your own...
Don't give up. I know you can do it...
Thank you for being helpful...
Words should reenforce valuable lessons or give bring attention to situations that were handled well. There should also be ample words to show that children belong and are needed and appreciated. Be careful, however, not to throw out labels that make your child feel that they have arrived.
Being told that you are superior in some way, may have a negative impact. There could be a feeling of false pride or the needed effort to do the job may slack off. Raising confident kids requires constant attention.
Children are all different. Some need special attention in some areas and some in others. Parents need to be aware of personality and tendencies. Taking responsibility for recognizing
low self esteem
is key to helping turn this into high self esteem or a good self concept. Parents need to continually be aware of their childs issues and have the wisdom to support and encourage. Your kids self esteem will take them into the future.
