Symptoms of stress: Identifying relationship problems

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Silent, deceptive stress

Pressure and stress develop and grow depending on the unique perspective of each person. Interaction with people, activities, the environment, and life in general may start out tranquil enough. As situations change, however, pressure points develop that build stress levels. This process may increase tension but the symptoms of stress might go unnoticed.

Becoming aware of the stress is the first step. It is important to admit that we are facing issues and life changes that may be diffficult to adjust to. Stress can be deceptive. Human nature is prone to say, "I can tough it out through any hardship". For some issues, this might work.



A person may put on a strong front and pretend that there are no problems and certainly no pressure. Others may set up barriers, come across defensively, put up an angry front, or even become silent or distant. Basically, these people set up walls that make it hard to solve their problems and their pain.

What is needed...? Building an awareness of the potential damage and then being willing to make changes. Statistics regarding stress related illness should further encourage looking at the causes of stress.

What is stress?

When the circumstances around us are working as expected, there usually is not any added pressure or strain. Then something happens to change normal behavior or threatens to change the norm. The reaction may be caution or fear. In most cases, this kind of stress is expected and will help us get through everyday problems. This stress causes temporary changes and the body recovers.

Stress becomes chronic when life issues seem entrenched with no end in sight. It could be an overbearing boss or it be difficult problems between spouses. Many can't take this pressure and end up running from it. On the other hand, the response may be to stand and fight. Either of these approaches could help depending on the issues. Often times nothing is done and the stress levels continue to build.

The definition of stress from Websters is: "(1)Any stimjulus, as fear or pain, that disturbs or interferes with the normal physiololgogical equilibrium or an organism. (2)Physical, emotional, or mental strain or tension."

How does stress effect health?

Initial stress symptoms can be chronic headaches or increased likelihood of colds. These problems are often ignored. People often look in other directions to overcome these health issues. Some stress nutrition and the need for a more balanced diet. Others look at the lack of sleep and try to overcome in that way. The warning signals of stress can be deceptive.

As chronic stress becomes more entrenched, more serious health issues develop. This can include depression, diabetes, hair loss, heart disease, obesity, tooth and gum disease, or ulcers. Most doctors visits originate from the effects of stress. It would be well to pay attention to the early symptoms.

Interpersonal relationships

Relationships exist between spouses, parent and child, employee and employer, fellow employees, neighbors, and the list goes on. These relationships change. We change and the other people in our lives change.

The changes can be unexpected and confusing. Human nature and selfcenteredness play a role. When unresolved issues arise in these relationships, stress builds up. Pride or apathy may block resolution and allow stress to be a long term problem.

Promoting healthy relationships with friends, relatives, or coworkers helps address pent up issues and stress. I need others who are strong enough to reach out to us during trying times. At the same time, I need to be open and honest about issues that are bothering me.

Bottled up frustration has a negative affect both phyically and emotionally. Others can look at my situation objectively. They can listen without judging and offer encouragement and assurance.

They can also offer different perspectives and direction in a sensitive way. I need to have these types of people in my life. I also need to be open and transparent about my problems.

I have had others who seemed to be in my life at the right time and purpose. I have also been able to support others in the same way. Looking back on these various relationships, there are a number of traits that were beneficial in the relationships:

• Be a good listener
• Mature and has experienced the highs and lows of life.
• Patient and understanding in dealing with issues. Refrains from instant solutions.
• Stands on principle. Will not always be in agreement.
• Handle venting and frustration of the other person.
• Able to offer constructive criticism and still show acceptance and encouragement.
• Be transparent and honest.
• Admit it when I am wrong.

Workload

Environmental changes

How to relieve stress

Getting help?

Living on this earth automatically signs us up for the trials and stresses of life. Does stress affect your overall health? The answer is YES. Cultivating healthy relationships is a key way to handle the ups and downs of life.

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